Nex vents

I thought it only gets better, sweeter, less thoughts, more products. The other day as i was seated in a shuttle on my way from Eldoret, I'm not sure what triggered this thought but i remember asking the person seated next to me, now a friend, whether there is someone who can stand and say, "aah! I have it all figured out now!" As i write this, my face is getting those creases that tend to form a smile because, a few blogs past i remember thinking and writing how i have gotten the formula and the key to life. :D :D :D Ok, now it is soo funny. But I insist, so there is the thought of destiny and purpose. two words that were almost always my prayers for so long, until one day I had to whisper to myself that God has ears and He has heard me and He must be in the process of answering me in my day to day life. (Pause for effect) . What caused this battle within? is waking up everyday and thinking that I do not know how to live. I used to actually have this feeling a...

Life has become a run. A run that doesn’t seem to have an end, unless of course you breathe your last. I am very intentional when it comes to things that make me stop, breathe and be present. Things that involve adrenaline, or mysterious happenstance like sunrise or sunset at the beach; or in the city, The moon and the stars, the breeze, the clear blue sky. It’s in moments like these, that those memories need to come alive; and encourage me that this cold morning shall come to pass  A warm hug from a friend this morning would do too, or a genuine smile from a stranger,A random blossomed flower, An mpesa message from someone who owes me money   , An unexpected public holiday LOL! Ok, i should stop now; there are so many things to be grateful about out here though. So, I thank God for friends who travel, that's how i have managed to feel like I was at the coast, just the other day!

The last time we checked my career status, it is totally different from what it is now. I sat down, went through an overhaul; ok i'm exaggerating, it is not that different but it has some personality now, I must add. Whoever said,  "it is paradoxical, yet true, to say, that the more we know, the more ignorant we become in the absolute sense, for it is only through enlightenment that we become conscious of our limitations. Precisely one of the most gratifying results of intellectual evolution is the continuous opening up of new and greater prospects." I know in my previous post i mentioned the life and the growth; Now as i write this, i just feel like we just  go round and round. The tip of one thing is the starting point of another, there is always something around the corner. (I have totally digressed). Back now to what I really wanted to write about.  As the days go by, a lot changes, some good, some bad, some hurt, some not so much; I have met ne...

Hey Reader, My name is Nekesa, My friends call me Nex and I am coming back to update a blog after eons. I may have changed tones, so my writing has changed of course; and maybe i stopped updating because I rarely vent nowadays; or maybe it took a more subtle route. So in matters catching up...I have had a LIFE. I don't know how life has been described in the dictionary but it should always be an  answer to a greeting. "hey, how have you been?" Answer "life" because trust me, life happens. I have had a loooot of life this while I was away and quiet. I have learnt a lot, I have grown, oh! I am so big (not physically) my person has grown big, my head not so big. Apparently when you  learn much,  your head tends to grow small, Because your perspective changes, you see things in a new light or from a new angle, You realize how wrong you were about right and how right you were about wrong or something in between. You realize that everyone has something going. Y...

Its at times like these when thoughts cannot seem to come to a resolution, actions don't match up with the words spoken and the will of the heart that we decide to just ramble out sentences and maybe when read later, anyone and everyone will try and make out what exactly was going on. There are things that happen as a result of our repressed thoughts and feelings in our hearts; for instance i may go on a shopping spree when i have decided deep down in my heart that i need to treat myself, yet i have not really given thought and budgeted on the cash at hand/wallet; its like a rebellious movement. That's exactly what just happened to me a day ago, so at the moment my thoughts, body and heart still haven't agreed so i still feel scattered all over the place; The body is happy, the thoughts/heart are like welll...?so is that it? is that why you made such a fuss? and it gennerally sucks to think of the future implications of the stupid short-term rebellious movement. You do un...

Is there anything like re-living a situation? coz i know i am, doing exactly that. i am re-living a situation in my mind, a situation i went through two years ago, but now i look at the situation as me, then, it was totally somebody else going through all that, being strong for everyone around, i used to feel the pain but not as much, i would never really be able to explain the calm and sense i got into me during the actual events happening; so point is, i am re-living the whole experience as if it was just yesterday, this time, i am in my own body and mind and it tends to get tricky, weird,..but i am hoping that after this that moment will come, that moment that depicts the change forever in someone's life, a different discourse is taken from then on coz of that moment, routines broken and new ones adapted, new habits formed, character moulding,and the like..Oh, i am looking forward to that BIG moment.i have a very strong hunch, a gut feeling, that after i relive this moment, that...

Nop, that is not the situation i am in, i am sure we would be glad to all put our claws in it; that's the name of a script that i was attempting to put together for it to be staged or screened, maybe; after this awesome, great great online rendevous that has been keeping me on toes, physically and mentally and spiritually. Sincerely, been a rough but good road, very beneficial, i have gained a lot, learned a lot and then fell back from the rendevous like i was falling from some fantasy world but literally and this time it hurt; Good people are good because they've come to wisdom through failure. We get very little wisdom from success, you know. ~William Saroyan: i had to copy paste that quote so that i can end this particular piece, apparently it is still very raw to be written with an objective perspective.   One thing i have come to appreciate though is the adversities we go through, the challenges we come by day by day, what matters is not how wrecked you are by the blo...